install theme

Sometimes I forget a couple of my friends do porn

And a gif or photo of them fucking shows up on my feed. It’s awkwardly awesome haha. You do you, girls! <3

Beers and shuffle board with my human.

Sometimes when I catch glimpses of this photo, I have a hard time believing I got such a gorgeous, handsome man. I’ve never met a more intelligent, loving, funny, sweet, charismatic and talented man. He goes so far out of his way to make me smile, make me happy or make me comfortable. I’ve never been with anybody that treats me like I’m some goddess queen without making me feel like I’ve lost my independence or without making me feel like I’m some fragile flower. He makes me feel like an amazingly strong and powerful woman. He has this way of treating me in a way where I know I don’t NEED him, but god damn, am I lucky to have him <3

If porn blogs could not follow me

That would be greeeeeeat. 

Face hugger cuddles.

Why are hippies

Always the most defensive, lazy assholes? Every self proclaimed hippie I have ever met was a huge dick with the most fragile ego…






girls think having a period sucks but try having to fix your penis discreetly through your pocket 

having the insides of your organs shed and come out through your genitals does not compare to having displaced balls sorry

none of you can do it discreetly anyways

we see you

everyone sees you

My insides are currently falling out and I’d punch any guy in the face right now that tried to tell me this shit.

Domestic as fuck

Spending the day cleaning the crap out of my baby’s room and bathroom. He deserves all the nice things and a clean comfy room to come home to and relax.

At least he always looks happy and adorable. ^_^
Babe tried taking a photo of me looking pretty. Instead he got bitch face for days.



I thought we were having a moment…you ruined it

I’m crying


Woke Jonny up with a blow job and now we’re drinking beer and watching cartoons. We’re awesome. ♡

Ready for a sushi/Doctor Who premier date with the hubby!